wish someone had told ME before I became a mom....

Before motherhood, I wish someone had told me to:




1. Enjoy sleep. Nap. It’s a luxury that becomes a necessity you never seem to have enough of. Buy nice sheets. Roll around in them. Spend a whole day in bed. The next time you do it, you’ll be comforting a feverish, puking child and that’s not nearly as enjoyable.



2. Appreciate your body now. As flawed as it may be, after children it will be worse. Droopier, stretched out and mushy.


3. Drive a fun car. A convertible or a Beetle. I had a CONVERTIBLE BEETLE and now it's sitting pretty at the dealership. I haven't upgraded to the "mom van yet" though, so I'm doing good!



4. Travel with your significant other. Family vacations are wonderful, but not the same. And finding someone to watch the kids? NO BUENO!



5. Eat out at really nice places. Indulge in a five course meal. Chew your food. Savor it. Soon you’ll be dining at chain restaurants scarfing down left over grilled cheese. If you’re lucky enough to get to a nice restaurant once you have kids, you’ll be paying the equivalent of an extra meal in babysitting fees. Linger.



6. Do things spur of the moment. Jet off somewhere at the last minute, with nothing but the clothes on your back. Have an impromptu adventure. Once you have kids you’ll need to plan everything.



7. Call in sick to work and use the day for yourself. Moms never get the day off, and you’ll make up for that sick day ten fold by caring for sick children when you are indeed yourself, sick.



8. Spend money on yourself. Invest in some really great forever items, because once you have kids the trade off will not seem worth it. You’ll calculate the number of diapers you could buy for the cost of those designer sunglasses. Buy them now and wear them later.



9. Pee with the door shut. It will be years before you get to do that again.



10. Under-appreciate your parents. Roll your eyes at them. Question their actions and judgment. Tell them they don’t know everything. Once you have kids you’ll have a new-found appreciation for them, and discover that they know a lot more than you gave them credit for. Ignorance is bliss.